Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Weak in the Knees


And not in a good way, if there is such a thing. I've had a ton of surgeries and procedures done on myself, so I thought I could handle these things when dealing with other people. Oh, I was so wrong. My grandma had an OUTPATIENT procedure done on her forehead that needed stitches. No big deal. Hmmm. While changing the gauze at 5am, I realized, not only can I not look at it, but I get weak in the knees, light headed even. Beads of sweat pool on my forehead and all of the color drains from my face. I literally start to swoon like I'm wearing a darn corset from "Gone With the Wind". I was in this situation to HELP but actually had to leave the room to compose myself. "Um, Mom. I need to get out of here. I might be sick." I guess that takes nursing off the list...

Monday, December 12, 2011

I HATE Clowns

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Is there anything scarier, seriously, than clowns?? Really. I hate them. They've got these maniacal smiles. Fake painted faces. And ENORMOUS feet. You add all of that creepy to the haunting dun dun duh duh duh da dun dun duh dah. AAAAHHHHH!  I hate clowns. I hate clowns. I HATE CLOWNS! (I keep looking over my shoulder as I write this just to make sure one didn't sneak in.)  You may wonder why I'm telling my secret, crazy fear. Because I see them everywhere!!! On the street. At church fairs. Driving in the car next to me. Don't worry, other people can see them too. I'm no Haley Joel Osmet who sees clowns.